knowledge & innocence

In July of 1997 1987 our first child, Joel, was born. Forty four hours later he was dead. Hypoplastic left heart syndrome causes the left side of the heart, including the aorta, aortic valve, left ventricle and mitral valve to grow underdeveloped from the moment of conception forward. It can go undetected where there is no known history of heart problems in the family. Such was the case for our son. He brought us much joy even in such a short time, a good portion of which we did not spend together as he was flown from Peterborough Ontario to Sick Kids Toronto. No donor heart was found on such short notice and so Joel has flown home to die in our presence, something for which I will always be grateful. Later that same year a baby boy born in British Columbia survived the same congenital heart disease with advance notice and a donor heart. If I recall correctly, at the time roughly three hundred deaths annually were attributed to this disease. In early 1990, in the ugly, under lit basement of our rented house I came to terms with the loss in a new via a drawing that would turn into a kind of tribute to our son. At the time I was reading the poetry of William Blake and was particularly moved by his set Songs of Innocence and Experience. and this drawing is the result. ::thrive! O

Comments

[O]

P.S.
Even though a lot of art has been done since this drawing was created it remains the favorite of my wife.

[JustMe]

I like it. I've always loved the name "Joel." So holy. How awful to get him here safely, only to lose him in less than 2 days. When it comes to parting with a loved one, there's no such thing as stoicism. But art.. yes, there is art; that captures someone forever to hold with us. I'm sorry, Owen and Mrs. Owen. Someday, you'll introduce us all to Joel from the place Jesus went to prepare for Him, too. Thank you for sharing..

[tiber jumper]

A beautiful and moving painting.

One of the best songs I have ever written (I've been told) was in the period after my wife died in 94. Girl from eternity.
Art and Pain are inextricably bound together I think. God gives us the privilege of expressing our pain in the gift of art.

God bless

[Carbonform]

Subject in an artwork can come about in countless ways. The rendering, the craft, and sets of directions the medium is formed can give way to cues that can pull at emotions, memories, and feelings. It is not the artwork in itself that holds all it can be - it's the viewer that has chosen to allow more to come to light.

I'm always in awe of how we can have such an amazing world continuously all around us yet there has always been a need to create art, and from which we seem to 'see' so much more. There is a great and magical faith and hope implied in art.

Art has the potential to calm our existence - for the viewer and the artist. This is evident in your painting this image.

(O, I'm a little confused about the years stated in your post?)

[O]

Dear Carbonform,
your are one of the longest standing readers of onionboy.ca and I am always pleased to hear from you. As I began to resuscitate this overly neglected space I thought about you, no, really, and wondered if I would hear from you again.
Here you are and, as always, your comment is well worth the reading.

Excellent catch on the years, thank you. I have corrected the first date which should read nineteen *eighty* seven not 19*9*7.

- - -

Thanks T.J. and Justme. Many perspectives and thoughts welcomed.

[wilsonian]

A beautiful glimpse into how Jesus saw Joel when they met face to face... his left side perfect.
It was so good to have an introduction to your son, O.
Thank you.

[Curious Servant]

Thank you for your continual prayers and kind words of encouragement.

Your picture ties in with some advice I just received at Job's Tale about a picture I am contemplating.

God bless, my friend.

[O]

wilsonian,
that's what is so interesting about art. I hadn't seen this painting that way at all.

CS
You're welcome and that's interesting. I hope you have had some good suggestions.

[susie]

Owen, that is beautiful and so touching. We have two sons...boys always have that "boy" look about them. Knowing, curious, mischievious and innocent. Bless you and your dear wife. You have a powerful Saint in heaven interceding for you and I know one day you'll all be reunited in the Presence of our Lord and our Lady.

[Butty]

good art and god bless you

[Owen]

Dear Butty, thanks for visiting. Interesting to see your own blog fully dedicated to Congenital heart defects.